For The Love of My Sister
by Justine123
Summary: Set after Battle Wounds and the Scars They Leave Behind. Kristina puts her heart on the line in order to give Sam the joys and triumphs of motherhood.
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter One**

The bitter breath of January wraps itself around me as I hustle towards the small café in the shopping center down by the docks. My mother's probably going to be sitting there partially annoyed by my tardiness but hopefully there won't be a third degree. Some things you just shouldn't share with your mother, no matter how old you are.

I wave the maitre d' off as a spot my mom seated at a table with a perfect view of the water. She hasn't ordered, so either she arrived just before me and won't know I'm late, or she just decided to wait and make me feel guilty later. I huff as I sit across from her, unwrapping my scarf and unbuttoning my jacket, taking off my mittens… "Hello sweetheart." Alexis leans over to kiss my cheek.

"Hi, mom." My face beams back at her. A waiter swoops in to give me a menu and I order a coffee and mom orders decaf tea. I sift through the menu trying to decide if I want lunch, or breakfast and I catch my mother starring at me.

"What? Is my face still red?" I unconsciously rub at my cheeks, knowing they were a tad rosy when I walked in.

"No, no. It's just… weird that I'm having a lunch date with my daughter. It used to be me coming home and you and Molly would be on the couch watching cartoons or something. Now it's just Molly and she's growing up so fast. She's going to 16 soon." She breaks off then, tears closing in and she dabs the corners of her eyes with her napkin before placing it back in her lap.

"Oh, mom." I reach out and pat her hand. I know it's been a lot of changing over the past few years; Keifer, Ethan, high school graduation, Sam and Jason's wedding, my college graduation, Molly becoming a teenager. It seems as if our lives have just been set on a Ferris wheel, constantly rotating and swishing through the air.

"Oh, don't mind me. I'm just having a moment. Watching all of my babies grow up. It's joyful and sad at the same time. If you can believe that." She gives my hand a squeeze and we get our drinks, order our lunch and go back to our conversation. "So, how are _things_?" She gives me a hesitant look and wraps her hands around her hot mug. I shrug at first, not knowing exactly how to lay things out for her, or in what order I should lay them out. It's kind of like laying out clothes, do you put out your underwear and bra first and then the jeans and t-shirt over; or, do you put the jeans and t-shirt out first and then your under garments?

"Well… what do you want to know first?" She quirks her eyebrow at me and sips her tea.

"Surprise me."

"Well, that helps." I suck in a mouthful of coffee, hoping someone slipped some courage into the sugar packets I used. I pull my shoulders back and lay everything out. "Ok, well, Ethan and I are holding off on looking for a new apartment. We like the studio we have and it just seems wasteful to look and move again if we decide to buy a condo or something. Plus, I'm still in the process of drawing up blueprints for my bakery idea and…"

"You've going with the bakery?" I nod cautiously and her smile spreads slowly and brightly. "I was hoping that you'd put your baking talents to good use! Have you decided on the location?"

"Not exactly. I want it close, but with the economy, either the rent is sky high, or the property is sketchy looking. Ethan became good friends with a real estate agent, specializing in business properties and he's keeping us up to date with the market."

"It's nice to know someone with connections." She gives me a wink and we share a laugh.

"You make him sound like he's in the mafia."

"He was close." She has that joking twinkle in her eye and we continue.

"Well, with the casino booming, he meets some interesting people, I'll say that."

"I'm very proud of Ethan. That man has come a long way and it surprised me at first, him taking on that kind of business, especially on a moving yacht, or whatever you want to call it. He's done a wonderful job."

"Yeah, he has. And he gets a little of both worlds. He gets to travel on occasion and he gets to have a place he can call home. Although, he hasn't done much traveling lately. He's hired enough staff to keep him onshore, rather than off. It's nice."

"How are the finances? I mean, I don't want to butt in or anything."

"Everything's working out. I haven't even touched my inheritance Sonny gave me last year and I'm still working at the clothing boutique and Ethan pretty much takes care of the apartment."

"Really, he's not gambling away his fortune?" She nudges my hand and even though I know she means it jokingly I have this sudden urge to defend him.

"Not at all. He's saved every penny he's ever earned. You should have seen his face when he opened up his first checking account. I almost cried for him."

"Kristina I didn't mean-"

"I know mom, I just thought you'd like to know that Ethan and I are careful and responsible adults now! It's kind of fun." We laugh and eat and sometime around my second cup I catch my mom staring at me again.

"What now? Something in my teeth?"

"No, no I just… wanted to ask you- oh, never mind."

"Mom." I put down my half eaten cheeseburger, yup, I went with lunch today. "What's on your mind?"

"Well, you know I was just curious about the whole you and Sam thing and-" I see she's hot under the collar, a blush rising up from her neck.

"You mean the whole me having a baby for Sam."

"Well, yeah." She hides her face behind her tea cup and I giggle at the childish look that has softened her face. Almost like she's embarrassed to talk about this.

"Sam and I didn't want to get anyone's hopes up so we've been kind of keeping everything hush, hush. We've met with a few doctors and found someone we both really like, her name is Dr. Petra and she's absolutely wonderful. Very patient, especially when Sam starts firing questions at her." I stop to take in her reaction, hoping that she won't blow up. But she surprises me. Her face tilts and she brushes a hand across my cheek.

"I am very, very proud of you Kristina. Very proud." A few tears trickle down her cheek and I reach out to catch them with my napkin.

"Thank you, mom. I'm proud of myself too." I give my self a pat on the back and again we laugh and she tells me to continue.

"Well, it's a long process but we meet with Dr. Petra again next week and we get all the information we need then. We'll also be given a few weeks to think it over, discuss it and we make an appointment to see her again if we come to the conclusion that we want to go through with it."

"Have you and Sam talked about what's going to happen once the baby is born, I mean provided you really do go through with the surrogacy."

"Of course. I know Sam and Jason have tried to have a baby on their own, but according to Sam, she has dubbed her uterus, 'a hostile environment.' She has all the other working parts, she just can't … stay pregnant past eight weeks. That's where I come in."

"Ah, I get it now." She leans in closer as the waiter takes away our empty plates. I get a refill on my coffee.

"This baby will have no biological relation to me and I say this now, I don't think it will be easy for me to just hand over the baby once it's born, but I have to keep telling myself that he or she is not really mine to keep. Once I do that, I know that this is the best and right thing to do. I don't like the idea of Sam having to go to a stranger for help when I'm able to do it for her." This is where the changes really start to grow in intensity. I've agreed to help my sister have a baby. Well, technically, we're still in the early stages of figuring this all out, but I know, deep down that I need to do this for Sam… for my family. It won't be a fast and painless journey, but nothing in life worth while ever comes easy. I take it one stride at a time and rely on my support system as much as they will let me.

My name is Kristina Davis, and I'm about to make a life changing decision.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two: Family First**

Sam had called later on that week buzzing with questions about my lunch date with mom. We made arrangements to meet up with each other to discuss a plan of attack; so to speak. Ethan had left for work an hour ago and I finally have time for myself. But I'm at a loss for what to do. I could watch TV but, there's really nothing good on at 10AM. I could make some coffee and then…drink the coffee and that still leaves 45 minutes until Sam comes ringing my bell. So, I make the coffee taking my time filling up the pot, counting out the scoops and turning it on. I even take extra care in retrieving my cup from its precarious perch on the second shelf of the cabinet. I get the sugar, a spoon to dish out the sugar, and my coffee creamer. It still doesn't eat that much time up so I settle for a late morning talk show and hope that today is the day Sam decides to show up early for once.

No such luck. She's late, as usual and I'm really getting into a marathon of the _Bad Girls Club_ but, I put the TV on mute so Sam and I can talk. "Where's Ethan?" I take her coat and shut the door.

"He's at work; he'll be back sometime after twelve."

"How's he doing?"

"Pretty good. He's hired more staff so that's lowered the stress level and he's home a lot earlier now." I take a seat on the sofa as Sam sniffs out the fresh brewed coffee.

"Is that Hazelnut I smell?"

"Just brewed a few minutes ago." But she doesn't hear me; she's already clinking mugs together trying to pour herself some coffee. She comes in with the rim of her mug warming her top lip.

"And how about you? Still baking?"

"Yup. I actually have a table at Grandpa Mike's. He's allowing me to set up some of my cupcakes and muffins to sell until I get a place of my own."

"Mmm, speaking of muffins are there any-"

"Cinnamon-apple muffins are in the fridge."

"You know me so well."

"Sometimes it's scary."

With a mouthful of muffin crumbs, Sam shifts on the couch. "So, I guess we better talk about what's going to happen in the next few months. I mean, provided you still want to go through with it."

"Sam, we know what's involved. I'm not going to change my mind. We just need to iron out some of the details so that everyone is on the same page. Especially mom. Because you know she's wants to be apart of this."

"So does Ethan and Molly. Jason's pretty much a given too."

"Yeah, and I thought Sonny, Michael and Ethan were going to be bad. Jason's going to be the proud papa, I won't be able to go anywhere without security measures in place."

"Jason's already got several different routes planed to get you to the hospital. He even has them color coded. I'm surprised call signs aren't involved."

"That you know of."

"This is true." We sip our coffee and get down to the nitty-gritty.

To get you all up to speed, I've offered to be Jason and Sam's surrogate. It turns out, Sam can't carry a baby past the eight week mark and doctors aren't sure of the reason. They tried for several months and with the frustration and disappointment, they finally made the decision to move on. I've read a lot of literature on being a gestational carrier and once I approached Sam and Jason with my idea, they were fully onboard. We went to an OBGYN specializing in gestational carriers and she walked us through the process and gave us a few weeks to make our decision. Now, the tough part is explaining the process to everyone else. It's a lot of long, drawn out medical terms that no one else understands except the doctors. In laymen terms, doctors create a baby in a Petri dish using Jason and Sam's DNA and then implants that embryo into my uterus. It's all very clinical and to the point. But it's what Sam, Jason and I want to do; that way the baby is completely, 100% theirs.

Sam and I go over the pamphlets that Dr. Petra gave us. The hormones we'd have to take, the side effects, dosage… by the time we're done reading, it looks as if Sam wants to forget the whole thing and talk Jason into adopting cats. "There's just so much that you have to go through Kris. I didn't realize-"

"I did Sam. I knew what I was offering you and Jason."

"But you're giving up months of your life to do all this."

"I'm not giving up anything. It's not like you're all going to ship me away to some far off land. I'll be surrounded by every overprotective family member we have and we'll all get through it."

"Kristina, I just-"

"I'm having your baby Sam. That's it. I know how much this means to you. I know that you're scared and frustrated that it has to be this way. But when this is all over, you get to hold your son or daughter and it won't matter how he or she got here."

"When did you become the voice of reason in this family?"

"Somebody has to be." Sam has been defeated but, in a good way.

"Ok, Kristina. Have my baby."

"I think that's a wonderful idea."

The night that Sam and I decided to tell everyone officially, came too soon. And by everyone, I mean mom, dad, Mac, Luke, Tracy, Michael, Morgan and Molly. We had dinner plans arranged with mom, of course Mac was probably doing most of the cooking and they both had their suspicions but, Sam and I agreed we needed everything out in the open. Everyone had to be on the same page so that no one felt left out or cheated.

I have this nervous butterfly batting around in my stomach. As sure as I am about my decision, I still value my mom's acceptance whole-heartedly. If she shows any doubt, for a second, of my capability in going through with this; I'm not sure I could muster the extra strength it would take to move on.

"Stop pacing, love. You're going to ware a hole in the carpet." Ethan tugs on my clenched hands, relaxing them into open palms. "What's got the gears in that pretty little head of yours spinning?" The sweetness in his accent relaxes me to a point where I can sit without my legs jiggling.

"I guess it's just fear."

"Of what love?"

"Disappointing my family. Letting them down."

"Honey, if this is disappointing to your family, then we need to have a talk. You are giving something to your sister, that she can't give herself. You are giving up your body and your life for nine months. If that's disappointment, then there's a problem here."

"What if I can't give the baby to Sam? What happens if I fall in love with her baby, what am I supposed to do then?" These questionable fears had me up all night, tossing and turning trying to wiggle them free from my nightmares.

"Unfortunately love, you won't have any legal rights once the baby is born. The courts won't give you the chance to run. But, I have faith that deep down, you know you can do this. You will fall in love with this baby, it's a given but, he or she will be part of this family no matter what. The baby will always be a part of you. We'll be ok."

"All of us?"

"All of us." He helps me off the couch, quickly pulling me into a bear hug. "I can promise you that no matter what happens, I'll always love you."

"Ethan?"

"Yeah?"

"I feel the same way about you too."

"Good. Now, can we go? I'm awfully hungry." I take the opportunity the swat his backside before high tailing it out the door before he can seek vengeance.

I'm still shaking by the time mom ushers us in through the front door, but my stomach settles just before Molly hurdles towards me with arms outstretched. Her hair smells of my favorite coconut shampoo and I've missed being around her all the time. "I have so much to tell you. Logan McKade is so going to ask me to the _Spring Fling_ dance and I know this because Kaitlyn told Amber, who told Ashley who then asked Ryan, Logan's best friend and he said it was true and…" Ethan lets go of my hand so that Molly can drag me into her room telling me stories of the hunky Logan and that I must go with her to pick out a dress, even thought the dance is months away.

Sam and Jason end up being an hour late and that gives Molly just enough time to show me pictures of her new crush and to see if I think he looks a little like Ryan Reynolds; if he had blonde hair, a six pack and grew an extra few inches. Ethan had found solace with Mac in the kitchen. The two of them are talking quietly and I don't want to sneak up on either of them. But, Ethan holds out his hand, without looking behind him and I instantly grab it, turning into his side. Mac looks at my slightly frazzled face, "Molly finally released you?"

"Barley. She needs a breathing break. I snuck out while she went looking for mom."

"We've been hearing a lot about this Logan character. He seems nice enough. Quiet."

"When's the background check going to be done?"

"It's already in progress." Mac gives me a wink before handing Ethan and me a bowl to take into the dining room.

As hungry as Ethan was, he takes his time eating and he and my dad are talking about the casino and that dad wants to set aside a week to take some business partners on the Stature of Liberty tour. "I can book a section of rooms for you and your partners. Just let me know when and how many rooms you need."

"It's not too late?" Sonny takes a swig of his coke; dad had surprised us all a few weeks ago when he had mentioned he was cutting back on his drinking. And so far, he hasn't touched liquor in two weeks.

"Not at all. This Saturday ends the tour to Florida and we have a few people on the wait list for the Statue of Liberty."

"Perfect. I'll send the information to your office tomorrow."

There's more chatter coming from Luke and Ethan, Mac and Sonny chiming in here and there. Sam's eyeing me strangely and mom takes it upon herself the tap her fork against her champagne glass. Conversations cease and heads make a sharp move towards my mother. "Everyone, I believe Sam and Kristina have something to tell all of us."

"Mom, this can wait until after dinner."

"Oh, why keep them in suspense? Go on, tell them." Her eyes urge me to spill the beans and I look helplessly towards Sam. She makes the same urging eye movements as my mother. 'Gee, this is really her news not mine, why do I have to-oh never mind.' I heave in a breath,

"I've decided to go through with my plan to have a baby for Sam and Jason. Happy now mom?" I grab my plate and excuse myself; this is not how I hoped the news would come out. Sam and I were supposed to be a team and if this is how it's starting, I fear for the road ahead. I hear the soft footsteps of Molly and I turn to see tears threatening to fall, her lips spreading into a Cheshire grin.

"You're really going to do this for Sam?"

"That's the plan." I get my second bear hug of the day from Molly, her tears soak through my shirt.

"I'm going to be an aunt!" It comes out as a happy squeal.

"I hope so." I smooth down her hair with the palm of my hand. I've missed this closeness with my sister. She's growing up so fast.

"Now, come back and join the party. Dad's passing out cigars."

"Already? I'm not even pregnant yet and already there's a party."

"We're all optimists tonight."

All that was all I needed to hear to quail my fears. "_We're all optimists tonight."_ I joined my family for dessert and coffee, gently being scolded by mom that soon caffeine would no longer be part of my diet. If she thinks I'm turning into a health-nut she's nuts.

It wasn't hard making this decision. It's sticking by it and not letting the doubts take over that is the real conquest. Sticking by your decision is harder than actually making it. But, my heart had already made the choice; it just took a little longer for my brain to get the memo.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter Three**

Ethan and I take a seat as Dr. Petra rifles through my file. His fingers clasped tightly with mine, reminding me of his support.

"Ok, everything looks really good. Your hormone levels are perfect and we've already harvested and fertilized a few of Sam's eggs. We can schedule you for In-Vitro in two weeks if that works." I grip Ethan's hand harder than I probably should have. He just flexes his hand and gives me that silly grin of his.

"Ok. Two weeks it is."

"Perfect. Now there are some ground rules for the two of you." Ethan looks stunned.

"Rules?"

"Yes. I'm afraid I have to advise against sex for the next two weeks. And for two weeks after In-Vitro."

"Oh. Well, we can do that. It won't be easy with the skimpy underwear she wears around the house." Dr. Petra puts her head down to cover up her smile and I just shake my head, two can play at this game.

"Oh, Ethan. Just because we live together doesn't mean we sleep in the same bed." I nudge him with my shoulder.

"You're right. Sometimes we're in the shower, on the kitchen table, the couch…"

"Alright you two. I get it. You have a more active sex life than rabbits. But, we can't risk Kristina getting pregnant on her own, with your baby. That is a road no one is prepared for."

"No worries doc. I will keep my hands where Kristina can see them."

"Preferably not in my pants. Correct?"

"Yes ma'am." Dr. Petra hands me the appointment slip and walks us to the door.

"You two are probably my favorite couple to ever walk through these doors. I hope one day that I'll be the one delivering your baby."

"Thank you doctor." Ethan and I shake her hand and head home. Two weeks from today, life will get a whole lot more complicated.

Although the past month has been an emotional rollercoaster; with me crying at the drop of a hat and Sam snapping at whoever dares cross her path, it's finally reached its climax and we both get to move forward. Sam's role is officially done. Mine has only just begun. The hormones we were given were to get us on the same cycle so that implantation had a better chance of working. Of course because Sam was the one with the difficulty it was easier to get her on my schedule, which meant less hormone therapy for me, which meant better living arrangements for me and Ethan. I'm a crier, whether it's the Sarah McLachlan commercial for abused pets or a cute puppy at the mall, I will ball my eyes out. Ethan and I had our fair share of laughing after I wiped my eyes for the tenth time; one Saturday, the Sarah McLachlan commercial came on six times; six! My face was splotchy and my nose was stuffy.

On the other hand, Jason camped out on our sofa more times than we dared count. It left him hoping that the hormone therapy would end soon. His wish was granted two weeks ago when the harvest was scheduled and now Sam is back to her old self; only occasionally pissed off.

I can hear keys jingling in the lock and Ethan comes in, a brown bag crunching as he walks into the kitchen.

"Mmm, is that cookie dough ice cream I smell?"

"Perhaps."

"With chocolate syrup?"

"How good have you been today?"

"Oh, very, VERY good." I bite down on my lip, hoping he's forgotten all about this morning.

"Has this morning slipped your pretty little head love?" _'Damn!'_

"Not exactly."

"Let's just say you had more than a spoon in your mouth this morning."

"Can I help that every inch of your anatomy tastes good? Perhaps you can skip showers this week. Then I won't want to lick and suck every part of you."

"I don't mind the licking and the sucking, it's the no sex for four weeks that's got me frazzled love. You get me all hot and bothered and I can't do a damn thing about it. I may just staple that naughty little mouth of yours shut."

"Could be kinky." I try to pull Ethan in for a kiss, instead he holds up a spoon and a pint of cookie dough ice cream. I'm torn. But I grab the spoon and pint and still have time to take a bite out of Ethan's lip. My tongue sooths the broken skin and he throws be over his shoulder and we have ice cream in bed; mixed in with a little making out! I have to say, cookie dough ice cream is pretty satisfying, but nothing comes close to Ethan and the pure manliness that radiates off him. I wish I could bottle his smell, but then I wouldn't want to share.

Work's slow one Wednesday; the afternoon rush would begin once husbands went back to work after lunch time. I'm keeping myself busy putting the clothes back on the right racks and refolding sweaters that have been discarded rather flippantly. I recheck the shoe racks, straighten up the jewelry counter and take a quick bathroom break. Ty peeks her head out from the back of the storeroom closet.

"Hey Kris, what time is it?" I glance behind me and it's two.

"Two o'clock. Why?"

"Go home."

"Is there something wrong?"

"No, it's a slow day, and you have a lot of things going on at home. So I wanted to give you a little present. Take the weekend off."

"Seriously?"

"Like a heart attack." She winks and puts the box she was rifling though back on the shelf. "When's the In-Vitro happening?"

"Next Thursday."

"Nervous?"

"Yeah, a little. A little anxious, a little scared." She takes a hold of my hand,

"You'll do great. I have a good felling about all this."

"Really?"

"Sure do. I know you'll need some time off so if you can just come in on Monday, fill out some paperwork and I can give you a leave of absence."

"Oh, Ty, that's not necessary. I can come back to work next Monday." She gives my hand a firm pat.

"Nonsense. Take this leave of absence. It'll be one less thing to worry about. Just come in every once in a while. I'm thinking I want to design a maternity line for the store. You'd be perfect!" Her hands brush my waist.

"And where will you put this new line of yours?" We look around the tiny store together.

"Eh, I'll make room."

Mom left a message on my machine asking to call her back, Sam's in a panic of some sort. When I start to punch in the familiar numbers of my mom's house number there's an incessant knock on the door. Ethan makes his way to answer it, but apparently the person on the other side is most impatient. "Alright, alright, I'm coming." His accent is still thick from his late afternoon nap.

Sam comes barreling through the front door, crazed and manic. "Where is she? Where's Kristina? I need to talk to her. NOW!"

"I'm right here." I wave from behind the island.

"Ican'tdo this,Ican'tdoanyofthis. Nope, not doing it. I can't. I won't!"

"Sam!" She's still pacing back and forth, hands ringing her hair rather painfully I assume. Ethan, with as much stealth as a NAVY seal slithers into our bedroom. "Oh, great. Thank you!" I call after him. He retorts by closing the door. "Sam, listen you have to calm down." I bring her to the sofa and push her down until she's sitting. I run to the kitchen and put the kettle on; preparing to make some tea. I find some peppermint tea bags in the cupboard and find a clean mug.

When I come back, Sam seems a bit more coherent. Her sentences are not so jumbled anymore.

"I woke up this morning and realized I know nothing about babies, newborns, infants, nor toddlers. I know nothing. I don't know what food is best to feed them. I don't know what kind of formula I should get. There are so many different kinds; iron, iron free… soy. Don't get me started on the diapers, wipes and furniture. It's endless." Her head drops slightly; chin to chest.

"Are you done?" I give her a warm smile.

"For now."

"Newborns only drink formula and if he or she has an iron deficiency, then you get the formula with iron. If the baby is lactose intolerant, then you get dairy free formula. If you have doubts you call the pediatrician."

"Oh, God, I don't even have one of those… baby doctors."

"You don't have a baby yet."

"Oh, right."

"Listen, you'll-**we'll **figure this all out in time. But how bout after we find out if there's even going to be a baby?"

"Yeah, that seems like a logical place to start."

"I know."

"How do you know about all this stuff anyway?"

"I've done some online searching. Right now, you're frazzled; I get that, but before you dive off the deep end, call me first. You and I, above everyone else are in this together." I lean and put my arms around her. She reciprocates arms tight and finger nails digging into my back.

"When did you get to be so much older and wiser?"

"Comes with the territory of being apart of this family."

"The Nut-Jobs?"

"Precisely."


End file.
